30 Days to HEALING BROKEN HEART

I decided to start myself oon 30 days to HEALING BROKEN HEARTED COMPLETELY .

Remember the word COMPLETELY .
I had friends around me like Xin Hui (Serene), Jay Chow , Samatha N Jolly , Gill , Church Sister Preacher Michelle and Yit Peng and also most important is myself I need walk past .
I think I owe them alot . I love it when Preacher Michelle give me a harsh dress down . Jay who told me it is emotional harazard . And Xin Hui( Serene) aka dear in my mobile . She reply my wat apps prompty and let the " wolf" know that I had a dear already .

Okay . First Thing first .....
Rearrange my finance . I am in hack broke becoz of my depression I overspent ....and then spend on future MONEY . Buying alot of heartbroken self improvement book , brought funny things like sharpener, SMIggle pens , eraser ...and nutrition vitamins . I want a complete change over . I splunge on make up and clothes. OKAY
FROM Today onward ....which 20th Of Nov ...Dont spending on future money . Maybe I will try doing a  part time job .

GET back to God ........
How .. I not sure . I had problem opening prayer to JESUS . I dont have this problem when I was faithful christian in my teens . I dont know how heading 35 , I am like going through a back sliding process . I cant open my mouth and tell God I need you desperately . I am in deep shit . I am falling short of your commandments , save me .....

Yes . That want I need to push myself to Go to church ....BUT I am really broke ..I am not POOR but broke ......and I had to ask from my parents money to top up my transportlink card . I hate beening in this situation . But I asked for it . The hospital bill are coming ......................

THIS SAturday ... I meeting Preach Michelle . michelle I really appreciate for giving me one to one personal guidance . Sometimes I felt that you are very HARSH ON ME . whenever you scold me. But I know it is good for me . You see me as a friend ..sister in christ ... And yours worlds stay ," DO YOU WANT TO GIVE YOURSELF HELPLESS TO WOLVES?"  What you want ?" Go steady with him be one year or two be his mistress , after he get sick of you . BYE BYE .

Yit peng too . She was very patient with me . She remember me in prayer for alot of ridculous stuff I given .  She become my wat app buddy . I worried I disturb them alot .

Samatha Goh n Jolly did a very good job of reminding me ....sending me powerful links  . Being the little 3 will not bring any good in my life ......
And people who tell me , OH SHIT ,XXX you forget . You volunteer in family centre before . YOU FORGOT how families are broken by mistress and then the desperate kids and wife kill themselves becoz of HUBBY Infidentily .
I guess ...........Jay Chow , U powerful .....I dun know I am glad that we are in the same boat ...Same boat ?What do I meant? It mean we are facing alot of difficulty and shit in my work .And we had to persist on . And thank for been there for me , even when your life suxz too much . You say it well when you say . Such a man doesnt deserve be a man .  remind me not to go back to XXXX . And remind me emotional harazrd in JOB .... Your wise words are sweet honey to me .


And Hui Xin .............You did the best ..You entertain my nonsense ...And You super patient with me ....Lend me all the resources you could provide .......Tell me it is not worth while to die for such man ....

Okay ... I didnt mention u here .. It is not I forgotten you all ..It is kept in my hearts ...Every single encouragements and words were God precious gift to me and healing balms to my broken apart soul ....

Here today should be day 1 towards closer to healing my broken heart and emptiness that had been living in me for 20 over years..................?